Uhm... I think mostly talaga it just hit me that eventhough we've had over a year to really prepare for the wedding, we really didn't maximize the time... didn't really do our research... weren't really vigilant about getting the best deals we could afford, didn't really save, etc.
Case in point... it also just hit me that what I originally didn't want happened. Because we took our time inquiring on venues, they got booked by others. Add the fact that I was very particular with the reception venue that I couldn't consider cheaper, more cramped alternatives.
And so we've now booked both venues and photographers. And are already several thousands over budget. So much so that it would really be unwise to splurge on other NICE things.
And yet, am being particular about the cake naman!
And then the gown.
And a part of me asks if going around and meeting different suppliers will really land me better deals or not.
My Baby just questioned why I even considered consulting with Tet...when she lives so far (Pasig). I pointed out the fact that it's far for him because he lives from the South, but for me, it's the same bother as going to Las Piñas for Mrs. Bautista. He got that.
But I can't help it, I had to cry.
Ms. Tet has given me her initial quotation for my gown, and it's far higher than Mrs. Bautista's. And I ask myself if I should try to haggle and bargain and compromise on certain things with her... or just let this matter go.
Heaven knows am not OC. Heaven knows din na I can be difficult.
Add to this a concern I blogged about in my other blog (baka kasi I didn't have a good cry over that kaya ako sensitive...or wait, PMS time ko na ba?)...
And wala na... talagang gusto ko na lang umiyak ng umiyak.