Of course, worse is relative... and right now, just a little bit non-conclusive.
Preg test showed negative (bwahahaha, but we did have some fun because I stupidly used the other side and wondered and wondered why my urine wasn't getting absorbed, ahehe) and we got worried. A trans-vaginal ultrasound later would tell us that I have polycystic ovaries. It doesn't look so bad, but it's there. And am still delayed, meaning there's really a hormonal imbalance.
I was shattered last Saturday... numb with fear and pain as I contemplated all the really bad possibilities. Not being pregnant YET is disappointing, but still ok... the possibility of infertility is another thing.
Still, having just gone off the pill last Feb, my body has yet to really tell us if i'd be forever imbalanced. Am also getting my blood sugar and thyroid checked, to rule out other possible causes for the hormonal imbalance.
Thankfully, my husband is more worried about my health than us never ever having kids. He has assured me again and again since that he loves me more. We told his parents about it, since they knew we were going to the OB anyway, and they were equally loving. Calls, texts assuring me they love me, and just want me to be healthy poured in. They also told my Baby that they know we feel pressured by them but that we shouldn't even think about that anymore. Last I heard, they're also going to set me up with another OB Gyne for a second opinion.
So, although it's still a little sad... am not depressed anymore.
I even told my MIL... that maybe it's really God's plan to have Iya and Pyro both enjoy our attention some more... esply since Pyro will undergo yet another cardiovascular surgery because of a new tumor growth.
I'm still thankful and hopeful... right now, we're going to regularize my period first. And hopefully celebrate Pyro's 3rd birthday with good news.
Hubby has been very supportive of my photography clases, he even bought me a digital photography book, complete with softwares. Bad lang sya kasi he's looking to buy a more compact digicam... di sana DSLR na lang! :D